I found out that I was pregnant on January 13th and I don't believe that I have written since. I treaded water from January through March, due to my first trimester. My only objective was to keep my current children in school, alive and feeling as loved as possible. All systems, expectations, and personal convictions were tossed to the wayside. I just waited for bedtime....every day. Nothing was done, enforced, or even spoken of, including chores, incentive stars, timeliness, tv and computer priviledges and the like. I fed them things that I would have never dreamed. I didn't even look at an onion or a clove of garlic. It wouldn't be uncommon for me to pass out on a floor or sitting straight up on the couch while they ran umuck. Although, I made sure to never fall completely asleep. I wore slippers 24 hours a day. Laundry piles would become mountain ranges that spread all over the house. It was sort of a nightmare. Somehow God granted me the serenity prayer that I didn't even have the energy to muster; "Grant me the serenity to accept that which I cannot change, the courage to change that which I can, and the wisdom to know the difference". I began to focus on two long-term goals which I felt completely convicted towards. The first being the natural, midwife-guided, possible homebirth of our next child, and the latter being the homeschooling of the sprites that we currently have.
Gene was gone Monday through Friday each week. This made the day to day hard, although I think it made things easier for him. No reasonable adult could stand living in that environment for very long. It did make me appreciate having the extra help on the weekends and Monday mornings. He was getting his territory up and running in Bakersfield, which was,and is to be our future destination. He was focusing on re-disciplining his life, one day at a time, in areas of health, faith, behavior and work habits. In doing so he has lost 60 lbs, through transforming his diet to one of a ketogenic paleolithic nature. Everything he has touched has turned to gold. God has blessed him, and us enormously.
Kaia has been plugging away in Mrs. Hoffman's class, with a considerably less amount of griping in regards to going to school. She found herself a new BFF named Julia; actually I would call this her FIRST BFF, as I have never seen her so consistently cling to another school mate. She began to dabble in elementary school drama for the first time; for example, pranks, letters, making boys one's boyfriend (without that boy's knowledge), squabbles with girls, and developing a distaste for people she once found tolerable. She always comes home talking, and always has a few reasons why it was a "great" day or a "HORRIBLE" day. One particular "horrible" day found Kaia telling this perilous story. "Today was HORRIBLE! Leilani kicked me in the head and I almost became AMNESIAN!!" This is Kaia we are talking about though, and none of this social stuff ever gets in the way of her school work. At home, she has enjoyed reading her chapter books (right now it is Charlotte's Web), playing on the computer, jumping on the trampoline with neighborhood kids, journaling about something that she learned or something that happened to her that day, playing catch with mom, or popping up some popcorn and relaxing. She tests the waters, from time to time, in regards to language. She tried "WTF" a couple times in casual conversation. Usually though, she keeps it very proper. On one occasion, she bid Gammy farewell for the evening by saying cheerily, "Good bye Gammy. And Please...have a good January!". One day I found myself allowing all four children to get knee deep in mud on a post rain day at the Hillsborough Park. Kaleb apparently snuck his seat belt off on the way home, and Kaia scolded me with,"You're a NON-PARENT!". That was actually not a bad definition for me, in regards to the last few months. As Easter was approaching, Kaia started thinking about what kind of dress she wanted. She had it crystal clear in her mind; light blue, flowy, conservative. Gammy and I took just her to the mall one weeknight and she browsed, and browsed...and browsed. Nothing was even close to long enough! Finally, at the fifth store she saw something she liked, which was, by the way, nothing like her original idea, but charming nontheless.
Gabby has had mostly good days at school. Although, having her Mommy transformed into a barfing zombie and her Daddy gone 5 days out of the week, has taken its toll on her. She would have a bad couple of days at school, in regards to behavior, here and there. I would know it as soon as I saw her walking out with her class, by the defeated look on her face and her slouched posture. Then I would get the details from Mrs. Riley. Some days she would be just tired, physically and emotionally. Homework is not usually an easy or natural thing for her. It is easy enough, but she just doesn't like sitting and doing it. Although some weeks, she will get a fire lit up her little toosh, and do the whole packet on day one! She LOVES the social aspect of school; the friends, the playground time, and the chatting. She is definatly a leader in the group. She is always getting a game started or a group congregated for something. She has a way of rallying troops and manipulating them into doing what she wants to do;and natural born salesman! She has continued to enjoy exploring, building, inventing and creating. She loves working in the office, with tape, scissors, markers, stapler and the like. She loves making mud pies in the backyard. She loves retrieving the chicken eggs for us. She always wants to go visit a neighbor..any neighbor. She spent many a rainy day building a fort, sometimes with Kaleb, and sometimes not allowing Kaleb anywhere near it. She developed some anxieties and fears in response to anticipating the move and having Dad gone so much. Some of the worries brought to the table at bedtime included bad guys that shoot and murder, invisible crocodiles under the bed, wolves in the closet, everyone dying and leaving her and orphan, and Dad going to jail for killing a bad guy that tries to hurt us. She also, just recently started scream in her sleep almost every night. It's similar to what I used to do, but with a nervous, scared undertone. She calls out needy, helpless, validity-seeking things, such as "NO! NO! PLAY WITH ME! DON'T LEAVE ME!". She remembers nothing in the morning. She has continued to mother Penny and carry on a love/hate relationship with Kaleb. She is excited for Bakersfield, but she worries about missing her neighbor Sandy. She is constantly asking me, "will we bring this with us?" in regards to pieces such as the front door, the wall, or the cabinets. She had a birthday!(blog to come)
Kaleb, too as made some behavioral adjustments in light of his strong male presence's absence. He has switched gears from ferverously obedient, to boundaries testing. A favorite one liner of his is, "YOU'RE not in charge of me'. It is tricky because he doesn't respond to reasoning (like most little girls), and he doesn't learn his lesson the hard way, the first time...or the second or third. It takes him a little while to really get it..that there is nothing in it for him, if he does something naughty. It is mostly little things that he is pushing buttons with, and it usually comes after a heaping portion of boredom. I try and arrange play sessions with his school buddies once a week. He looks forward to those all week, and talks about them constantly. When he has a friend (or a "brother" as he calls them) over, he is so good. They just play and leave mom and sisters be, for hours. He has been a great boy at school. He mastered the pooping-in-the-potty routine, finally. It took MANY hours and many nights of mom sitting in the floor of the bathroom, coaching him through it. Once he decided to push out the "monster poop" he got to go on a real Amtrak train ride with Gammy, and he got to go to get fried prawns with the family at what he thought was "Applebees" (which he saw on a commercial at Gammy's house), but was actually a much more desirable restaurant. He was also told that the family's Disney Land trip in March was for him to meet Buzz Light Year. He also, seems to have turrets syndrome, because he can't stop saying "vagina", "wiener", and "butt" in inappropriate social settings, and mind-you, COMPLETELY out of context. He got a hair cut and told everyone about it for weeks to follow, "I got a hair CUP! My dad and mom made it!".
Penny continues to excel in her social graces, vocabulary, and sentence structure. She loves coloring, or "writing my name!", and she can write "P" over and over again. She just needs a marker and a peice of scratch paper and she will scribble on it for an hour. She does insist that it makes its way to the fridge for all to see. She can be found standing atop the stool in their bathroom, fixing her hair, proclaiming," I'm piddy(pretty)! Awight!(alright) I'm all set!". When trying to keep her in bed for a few more minutes in the morning, I will ask her what she dreamed about, she mights say," um,um,um,um,um...pooped in the potty,and pooped in the chucky cheese...and got a new toy and got my money...and um..um..um pooped in a chucky cheese." We all got to meet Baby Ava. Penny always wants to see her picture in my phone, "wet me see it! wow! So cute! Baby Aba!" while kissing the phone. She can't accept not participating in the activities of siblings and mother, no matter how tricky they may be. She can sometimes be found sweeping the kitchen floor with the broom three times her size, while cautioning, "Watch ya toes!". She is still unbelievably reasonable, flexible, and obedient. She earned her very first slap on the hand in January when she laughed at me after telling her to "come". She then slapped me back, but immediately felt such remorse that she started rubbing my face, asking,"You Ok Mommy?You hurt?". She hasn't done it again since. She does a lot of talking from her carseat, "Mom! I'm talking to you! I'm sick! My baby huhts!(she claims that she has a baby in her tummy as well)My elbow huhts!" or "The sun is poking me in the eye!" or "I'm not going to Kaia's school...I go to my OWN school!" or "Don't Woh-wie!"(when movie stops working). She has a funny way of saying things sometimes, "No BahBoo. Don't touch my bottom...it's dangerous." She is also the master of pillow talk, "I lubb you soo mutz", while holding and kissing moms face over and over again. HEAVEN! She recently participated in her first sleepover at Gammy's house, which we had to glam-up as a "princess party" to get her on board. The girls wore their favorite dresses and received goody bags, while watching Tangled.
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